RED HOT PURITANS

We were talking about Puritanism in class the other day, so of course I need an obligatory pilgrim picture. Say whatever you want about the Salem Witch Trials, belt buckle hats, frumpy-ass capes, general shitiness toward Native Americans, and full body underpants. No one can deny they were some sexy motherfuckers. Mmmm, yeah. That's it. Nothing is hotter than a man with mouth length hair and a flashy belt set about his waist. Is that a large old-timey gun powder powered musket you have there? Hawt. Careful, though, ladies. If you try getting with brother Cornelius Blackerby before you're married, he will light you on fire.